I really debated whether to write this article or not, but I think its something that needs to be said.
In the past 20 years or so, it has become politically incorrect to say what you really think. But that doesn’t mean that people still don’t think it.
Now I think this is a good thing when it comes to things people cannot change. You can’t change where you were born, or who your parents were, or what color you skin is, or if you were born with some sort of physical or mental problems, and so on.
But I think this has led to an air of acceptance in areas where people can, and should change.
Take me for example. I still smoke. Yeah, I know. I do all this other healthy stuff, and I still smoke. I never claimed to be a saint…
Anyway, I’m sure there are many people who are disgusted by the fact that I smoke, yet they tolerate it and pretty much keep quiet about it.
Now, the funny thing is – if someone harps on me to quit, it pretty much goes in one ear and out the other. You can show me the black lung and all that other stuff. But, if people were to voice how disgusting it is, and how gross I smell, or how stupid I look outside smoking in the cold, or what a loser I am – that’s a little more emotional.
I think all this kindness is just enabling bad behavior.
Like the neighborhood drunks. Everyone is nice to them, and seemingly tolerant – but boy when they get home, they sure have a lot to say. Now, is the drunk not aware that everyone thinks he/she is an obnoxious idiot?
And when it comes to fat, I don’t know of anyone – thin or fat that doesn’t think it’s disgusting.
We all watch fat people eat. We watch how they load their plates at the buffet. We watch how they don’t fit on a chair, or how the rolls spread out in plain view between their shirt and their pants. We watch how they roll thier shopping carts full of pop and snacks in the grocery store, with barely a hint of a vegetable. Even fat people talk about other fat people.
Now I’m not saying that we should go back to being cruel. But I think its a good thing for all of us to be aware that people are watching and they still think what they think, even if they’re not allowed to voice it where you can hear it.
I think it would be a good thing for all of us to be more embarrassed by our own bad behaviors. Maybe that would make us a little more motivated to stop them.
What do you think?
P.S. Just writing this is making me think about how stupid I DO look (and feel) smoking out in the cold….
Carol,
I agree with what you are saying completly! As you know, I too, am still smoking in spite of all the other “positive” changes I have made in my life.. my quest to get healthy , physically and mentally… I run, yet i smoke.. I don’t like the wrinkles on my face and always am looking for the “miracle” cream to wipe out years of smoking and stress… I eat lots of fruits and veggies to ‘counter-act” the effects of smoking and hope to get lots of anti=oxidents to prevent cancer. Yet I still smoke.. one thing at a time I guess. . One day at a time…good post.. your not alone!
So stop with the smoking in the cold! It’s stupid. And I gotta tell you, having a husband just diagnosed with early stage emphysema makes me want to shake you.
So, is it a deal? You’ll stop the smoking–and stinking up your neighborhood. And I’ll stop buying a donut twice a week when I buy ice for my nutrition club. Yeah, see? Moral inconsistency is NOT just for smokers.
Hey Auntie Carol,
Like your article! Especially now that we will be all paying for everyone else’s health problems (i.e. liver failure and pancreatitis for the drunks, diabetes and every heart problem under the sun for the obese people, and all of the lung problems for the smokers—) Thanks to the new socialist medical coverage maybe people will start caring about other people’s failures in self care. ??
Carole,
As a former smoker, all I can tell you is that when you are ready you will finally do it. 1-800-Quit-Now can help. Email me if you would like support in quitting.
Due to medications I was on,& having no thyroid, I gained a lot of weight. I am now off those meds, eating healthier, exercising more,&still the weight refuses to budge. My dr. says it will be impossible for me to lose much of that weight because of the pill that controls my metabolism. If they give me a higher dose I’ll have heart problems. I would like to be thinner for many reasons-health,breathing more easily, more energy, looking more fit,etc.
The strange part of all this is I’ve had several people tell me that I look just right the way I am, don’t seem overweight, and shouldn’t worry about it because it suits me! A man actually told me that men like their women more full-figured. My husband must be an exception to that as he would like me to lose it, and so would I. Suggestions welcome!
Hi Beth,
You have been through so much. You know how I’m always harping on chemicals. Unfortunately, prescriptions are chemicals that we can’t do anything about in many cases.
I know you eat well and get exercise. Maybe you could try eating more of your calories earlier in the day, and lighter at night.
Thanks all of you for your supporting comments.
I quit smoking June 1, 1991. My building went smoke free and I was embarrased to be standing outdoors smoking, where everyone could see me.
If the law said I had to go stand outside to eat any calories over my alloted daily limit each day, I am pretty sure I would quit overeating, as well.
Hang in there. You will quit smoking when you darn good and ready. -Carol
Reply to Carol #6 comment
You could impose this on yourself if you know it will work for you- keeping track of your calories and standing outside if you go over.
I’ve done similar things when I wanted to make positive changes in my life. I don’t buy snacks much any more unless they are healthier ones. When I crave sweets I have to walk to town to buy one.