I hear it all of the time –
This isn’t done because (fill in the blank) won’t help me.
I can’t eat healthy because (fill in the blank) doesn’t like (fill in the blank.)
The house looks so bad because (fill in the blank) won’t do anything but sit on the couch when they get home.
So and so won’t do this, or that… Why should I have to?
People keep themselves in a miserable state because someone else won’t do something that they think the other person should do.It makes no sense!
It happens both at home and in the work place.
Are you living in a dirty chaotic home, staying fat and unhealthy, not taking a course you want to take, or any number of other things that would make you happy, just because someone else won’t do something?
“But Carole, you don’t understand….)
If I wanted to live in a clean home, wear any sort of fashionable clothing, eat good food, drive a car, take a class, etc. etc., I had to do it myself. I started working at 12 years old. I cleaned the house. I cooked dinner most of the time from the time I was like 16. Otherwise, I ate out.
No one was going to teach me to drive, or buy me a car.
As a single mom, I had one friend who helped me a lot. Besides her, I had no help. My dad and stepmom helped my half sister all the time. Me? Nope.
If I was always waiting for someone else to hold up their end of the ‘deal’, nothing would ever be done, and I would be terribly unhappy.
Is it fair?
Depends on how you look at it. Apparently, the situation is not making the other person unhappy, only you.
Most people are lazy. They want to do as little as possible in life. That’s the way it is. Everyone is walking around with this chip on their shoulder – “Oh, I shouldn’t have to do that!” Everyone seems to think that happiness lies in being able to do nothing. And very few people are happy.
Take responsibility for your own happiness.