I’m living with a friend and his 2 should be adult sons. I came home to crap on the toilet, hockers in the tub, pop dripped through the entire house, crusty dishes in the sink, wet towel on the leather chair…ARGHHHH! He’s 24! C’mon…
Yeah, it only took about 15 minutes to clean it all up, but still! And I can’t say anything cuz he’s not my kid (he’d be dead if he was…). I pity the girl who marries him…
OK, I keep telling myself – he was never raised in a clean house. He is better most of the time now, but he goes through these periods where I want to kill him. Old habits die hard, right?
Many women say, I would just leave it.”
There’s a couple reasons why this is not a good idea
Resentment will eat you alive!
You do it for your own well being. You have to live in that house. If you clean up the mess, the resentment will fade and life goes on.
If you leave the mess, the resentment grows and eats at you. Every time you look at it you get angry. You think it bothers them, but it doesn’t really. It only bothers you.
You think you’re showing them by not dealing with it. Which leads me to the next point – If you leave it, they win. It only gets worse from there. To them you have sent a signal that its OK to live like that. It really wasn’t as important as you tried to make out.
My daughter was recently talking about the time I threw her toys away. Guess how many problems I had after that?
I can’t do that in this situation. Well, that’s not entirely true… I do leave his indoor grill the way he left it. He cleans it when he wants to use it. I got tired of trying to save his nice barbecue set when he would just leave it outside all dirty to rust away. He finally did put it away after a couple of months.
I can only hope that these boys will someday grow up to be respectable members of society.
In the meantime, I will continue to keep the home clean an my peace of mind intact.